


Light Casts Shadows

by Demon_Apostle



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Anger, Kissing, M/M, Mindoir, Paragon Commander Shepard, Post-Virmire, Rage, War Hero (Mass Effect)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-20
Updated: 2015-11-20
Packaged: 2018-05-02 12:54:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5248979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Demon_Apostle/pseuds/Demon_Apostle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Commander Shepard was always a caring soul. But it seems as though that caring personality holds some fire. And someone's going to get burned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Light Casts Shadows

**Author's Note:**

> I own nothing of Mass Effect. I just recently started the game series and had to do something about Paragon Shepard going ape-shit.

It was almost shocking at first, seeing a side that he never saw before or even knew existed. But it made sense. With a pile of reasons to explain why, it made perfect sense.

 

He had learned about everything involving Shepard. If he was going to be working with the guy on missions then of course he was going to do a background check and figure out just what this person was like if he was going to become his superior. At first, Kaidan had expected a cold, ruthless man who wouldn’t care about anyone given where he had come from. Granted, it wasn’t as bad as Earth but being a kid who survived a raid on his home planet tended to make people hate and mistrust others very easily if they didn’t know them. But Shepard’s parents must have been some pretty amazing people if their son could survive a slaughter of his colony with his morality still intact.

 

But Kaidan was partly convinced it was just because that’s who Shepard was. A kind soul who, despite the hardship, risked his life for others even when everything seemed hopeless. People weren’t given the title ‘War Hero’ by running away and saving their own self. The man was a legend, a beacon of light in dark times, and Kaidan was lucky enough to witness that kindness and sharp wit in person. Shepard never turned down the opportunity to help someone, never seeming to get angry even when someone else was spouting harsh words and insults. To Kaidan, Commander Shepard was, in a way, a saint among the people, human and alien. He was sure no one would ever find a kinder, braver soul even if they searched throughout the entire galaxy.

 

However, Kaidan had not considered the possibility of Shepard having a cold, brutal side to him despite his normal disposition. But like he had said earlier, it made sense. Shepard had escaped the attack on Mindoir, watched people, both friend and foe, die in front of him, and had killed probably as many people as he had saved. In all honesty, Kaidan should have seen it coming but the thought never crossed his mind.

 

He can’t help but wonder why he’s so shocked by the new information about his Commander since despite how peace-loving Shepard can be, there will always be a shadow being cast by the light. Shepard had just never let that shadow be seen until now but at least he had let it be known that Commander Shepard was not above getting his hands dirty for a reason Kaidan felt justified what he had done. He just feels lucky that what had happened hadn’t been with an alien or caused a massive uproar.

 

In all honesty, the guy had it coming. Maybe not to the extent that Shepard delivered but it was well deserved. Even if the guy had been drunk off his ass, most would have more sense to not try and act tough towards a guy who fought geth and other aliens on a daily basis. Sadly, his sense must have ran away the moment he downed his first drink of alcohol despite how much the poor bastard needed it. Kaidan can almost remember the entire encounter perfectly.

 

They had decided to visit a bar for some downtime, Joker and Liara staying behind on the Normandy since social gatherings that involved loud patrons and brain-damaging drinks weren’t their kind of thing. Everyone else was all for getting slammed and forgetting about their worries for one night. Their small party had dragged on for a good hour, Garrus and Wrex chatting up a storm while Ashley was trying to talk Tali into talking to a lone asari patron but wasn’t really winning. Kaidan was content cuddling a bit with Shepard on the large, semicircle couch they had procured thanks to Shepard’s Spectre status. It was only when Shepard went to get a few more drinks that the night began to turn sour.

 

“Oh look. Th’ new Spectre come ta mingle with us little people.” Every word was slurred and almost unrecognizable but everyone still understood what he had said and was now watching to see what would happen. Shepard looked at the man, assessing his drunken state before turning back to the bartender.

 

“You’ve had enough buddy. You might want to stop before you get permanent liver damage.” It seemed as though the turian bartender was agreeing with Shepard but he made no comment even as the guy persisted.

 

“Ya military types are all th’ same. Shoot first, question later. Ya don’t give a damn what happens ta others.” The crew members had seemed to visibly tense as they listened to the man ramble. Tali asked if it would be a good idea to stop the other human before the crew ended up getting kicked out but Garrus and Wrex were starting to bet on how Shepard would react. Ashley and Kaidan just watched in horrified suspense as the man continued.

 

“What’d they call ya? War hero? Bullshit. How many died so ya could save ya own ass?” Shepard still hadn’t said anything back to the man and it looked like he was simply content to just ignore the man as he waited for the drinks. Kaidan was starting to feel the tension lift as the bartender began setting drinks in front of Shepard but the small amount of relief was short-lived with the man’s next words.

 

“It was a raid? Slavers an’ bandits? Wonder if they got ya whore mother. Bet she screamed in ecstasy when they-“ An abrupt stop to his sentence and a loud crack had almost the whole bar staring towards Shepard and the drunkard. The crew had watched as the Commander delivered a right hook at the man’s jaw, putting enough force behind the blow to break his nose and send him falling flat onto his back with the barstool falling with him. A profound silence hung in the air as the man gripped his face, hands muffling his cries of pain. Shepard loomed over him, clenched fist now bloody and his lips in a deep scowl.

 

Kaidan had learned from the talks he had with Shepard that the topic about the raid on Mindoir and what had happened to his family was a sensitive subject and that you were treading on thin ice if you said anything that might be seen as insulting. While he didn’t know all the details, Kaidan knew that memories from that time still haunted Shepard. You especially never said anything rude regarding his parents, something he learned when a turian citizen had said something sarcastic about Shepard’s mother and was quickly met with a gun in his face. Kaidan was sure everyone in the vicinity took note to never badmouth anyone Shepard held dear unless they wanted the wrath of the new human Spectre crashing down on them.

 

The guy at the bar must have never got the message or was too far gone to even remember simple information such as that or else he might not have said anything. But it had not ended there. While Shepard was known to have a will of iron that carried him through any situation it seemed as though that same will that kept him level-headed when faced with criticism and insults finally broke and withered into nothing. He stomped over to the guy who had not moved since his meeting with the floor and proceeded to deliver blow after blow to the guy’s already busted face. Kaidan figured that was a good time to intervene before Shepard actually killed the man.

 

“Shepard! Shepard, stop! He’s had enough!” But the commander persisted until Kaidan had grabbed his hand to stop the next blow.

 

“That’s enough, John!” Shepard seemed to have regained his senses then, staring at the guy beneath him with slight guilt and worry now breaking through the mask of anger and fury. He quickly moved away from the man who was unconscious but alive and stood completely still as if trying to take in what he had just done. He then looked at the bartender, muttered a quick sorry, and left the bar. Kaidan gave a small bow at the turian before marching after Shepard, but not before hearing Wrex one more time on his way out.

 

“Is this the part where we get thrown out of the bar for having a crazy boss?”

 

Kaidan found Shepard looking out one of the many windows of the Citadel and watching the cars fly by. He held his fists together as he leaned against the railing, not making any movements when Kaidan stood next to him and clutched the railing. No words were shared between them as they watched the cars. Kaidan wasn’t even sure what to say and figured Shepard would do the talking when he felt like it. He probably needed a moment to gather his thoughts anyway, something Kaidan was ok with and understood. Someone with Shepard’s nature would need a moment to regain their senses if they had just beat a guy half-to-death as well.

 

“Anderson isn’t going to be pleased is he?” Kaidan didn’t know whether to be surprised or not that Shepard had started off with humor but he didn’t dwell on it and simply answered.

 

“Probably not.”

 

“It probably won’t affect me anyway after the way that reporter tried to smear my name. It might not even catch anyone’s attention.”

 

“Maybe. How are you feeling?” He turned his head to look at Shepard and saw the man staring at his cleaned hands.

 

“Hands hurt a bit but I’m alright.” Kaidan nodded and turned his head back towards the window, letting them drop into silence again. He didn’t know if he should ask the commander if he wanted to talk or continue in silence before heading back into the bar but he was sure that if Shepard truly didn’t want Kaidan there he would have voiced his disturbance. Instead, they continued in silence until Shepard pushed away from the railing, Kaidan turning to look at him.

 

“I want to apologize. My behavior was uncalled for.” Kaidan just shook his head.

 

“You don’t need to apologize to me commander. That guy was out of line. I’m just happy you’re ok now. Do you want to head back to the bar or maybe retire to the Normandy?” Shepard seemed to think about it before nodding towards the bar.

 

“The night is still young. Might as well drink some more if they allow me back inside.”

 

Luckily, the bartender didn’t comment on the entire situation and gave Shepard and his crew a round of free drinks. Kaidan was almost sure the free drinks were because the turian was now scared of Shepard but he didn’t comment and drank happily.

 

Kaidan later found himself in his commander’s arms, mouths moving against each other in a drunken haste. They had found a quiet corner of the Normandy to run off to and were now in the middle of seeing whose tongue would win against the others. Both were stubborn and neither wanted to give in but Kaidan finally relented and let Shepard’s tongue invade his mouth. Hands grabbed at any place they could, squeezing the softer parts of their bodies. Kaidan had Shepard pressed against the wall, hands moving to settle on John’s perfectly sculpted butt. A lovely piece of artwork, something he told Shepard a while back during one of their flirting sessions. When they finally took a break from kissing, Kaidan smiled up at Shepard and spoke softly.

 

“Shepard… don’t take this the wrong way but seeing you go berserker on that guy from rage… it was kinda hot.” Shepard only chuckled and gripped Kaidan’s shoulders tighter before delivering another series of lip-bruising kisses.


End file.
